"When I have a kid, I wanna put him in one of those strollers for twins, then run around the mall looking frantic."

"I was walking down the street wearing glasses when the prescription ran out."

"I bought some batteries, but they weren't included."

"Today I met with a subliminal advertising executive for just a second."

"There's a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot."

"I just bought a microwave fireplace. You can spend an evening in front of it in only eight minutes."

"I do begin to have bloody thoughts."

"Come away,O human child! To the waters and the wild With a faery, hand in hand For the world's more full of weeping than you can understand"

"Anybody can sympathise with the sufferings of a friend, but it requires a very fine nature to sympathise with a friend's success."

"You are the only thing that's holdin' yourself back If you keep waiting you might miss another chance."

"The greater the difficulty the more glory in surmounting it. Skillful pilots gain their reputation from storms and tempests."

"Wherever I have gone in this country, I have found Americans."